Swallowing Them Whole

[Self-Pity - I]

Self-pity is not bad.
I repeat, self-pity does not have a value; it is not bad.

It just is.
It is normal.
It is understandable.
It makes sense.

I have never met a child experiencing self-pity, which is curious.

I have met children that are discouraged.
Unhappy.
Demoralized
Even depressed.

Self-pity has an “adult” wrinkle to it. It measures "the odds". It sees the world as the field on which we compete for “making it” and weighs the low chance of “success” or the impossibility of “achieving”. It bemoans other’s assessment and perceptions and swallows them whole—as fact, as determinative, as real.

The world is adversarial and I am weak.
The world is diabolical and I am hollow.
The world is impossible and I am insecure.

Children are fed the disempowering ingredients of self-pity until it becomes their own. The cards are stacked against them, and the obstacles are too great to even try.

Then they grow up.
And become me.