My Own Hostage

[Fear - IV]

Sometimes we fear ourself more than anything or anyone else. That was the challenge my friend, Amanda, faced.

She was her own hyper-critical, never-satisfied audience. She says, “I could never satisfy my ever growing expectations.”

When fear is inbred—arising from a disapproving self—it scares not once but twice. There’s the fear of not producing something satisfactory, and then there’s the fear of never arriving at the rest found in self-acceptance. It’s not only scary, it’s exhausting.

Amanda found a solution in the most unlikely way: a Divine insistence to liberate all people. At first that was a radical call to extending compassion to neighbors. But she remained a captive. She then heard, “You have become gentle and loving to my people, but you still hold one of my children hostage, let my daughter go.” In her words, "Thus began the journey of setting me free from myself.”

Her challenge has been to balance the paradox of not fearing herself while listening closely to fear alerting her to trust in the Divine Liberator.

Fear alerts us to the often denied truth that we may be our own prisoners.
(Psst. The keys are within reach.)