Stop the Transference

[More on Fear – V]

Fear is an emotion that doesn’t have a direct corollary to physical expression. Not all people react the same to it. Some fight, others flee, and still some freeze. Some bury it and try to move on, others verbalize it and shout, and still some curl up on their beds and sleep through it.

But many claim to be able to spot it in others.

“They’re living in fear . . . I don’t want to live in fear like them.”

I've heard this from compliant quarantiners about others that aren't staying home, and vice versa. I’ve heard this about mask-wearers from those that won’t get out of bed without putting on a mask, and vice versa. I’ve heard this from advocates of testing and from denouncers of the findings from testing. On and on. It’s coming from all sides of the COVID experience.

Truth is, we live in scary times. But you can’t spot fear in others.

Our denial and transference—redirecting or projecting our feelings onto a substitute—aren’t helping. They're merely entrenching us further in our fear and inhibiting us from solutions.

Name the fear. It’s our only chance forward.